lone and love

Sometimes I may write as if I am always blessed with happiness,sometimes i compiled all my sorrow in here,expressing much as I can eventhough little pay interest. Sometimes i smiled all the way laughed till I can hardly feel my lungs but little know what did I tried to hide. I worked day and night trying to fulfill my needs for my own satisfaction. For those who never see how my sweat are piled up working everyday might came up with simple conclusion that i used up daddy's money to get my desire fulfilled. I end up my relationship with someone I've been with for two years plus and jumped into another relationship so sudden. People never know how much heartbroken I was the time he left me and how i tried to mend everything by falling in love again. I might be complicated,sometimes i love to play around the bush hoping that someone would try to dive inside me and came up to surface finding what I wanted from that person. I think a lot when I am alone. That's why I always hated my insomniac part of me,there left me with no options than to stay alone early morning and think,reflects back what happenned. I love to talk,to find a friend whom I could tell what had I gone through the whole day ,the joke of the day that keep me laughing so that we could laugh together and how the roar of laughter always keep the day significant. I live myself with a very high life principles. How i make sure my every act and talk never gonna hurt a soul cause I believe that if i could treat people nicely there will come the time that i'll get repaid. If people are to do shut to me means that i must have done something wrong not to deserve the best. God always full of surprises. I never know what He had writen for me,whom had He wrote for me,but whoever is that.he must be someone that i worth getting. I believe that when He took someone from me,He's just preparing someone better for me. At the age of early twenties I guess its just normal that someone wanted to have a plan for another chapter of life as an adult. It's good to see that most of my friends are just preparing to step ahead to those chapter. I feel so much overwhelmed listening to their plans they keep align with their love ones. Allah maha adil eventhough I never be good in His eyes just how much i always tried. If love never come that soon,Hs surwly had an enormous surprise for us. InsyaAllah.