dear God,take this pain away.

i don't live to impress people,i blog just to express myself,i ain't seeking for attention. i tried to be modest,eventhough i ain't denying that i learned to be perfect. i don't want to create a bunch of foe,i want to create a showering love. this year is ending real soon,and as how much i always vowed i wanted to end the pain buried together with the year. its fun that i finally met my sisters last weekend,chilling out at hanni's birthday party rather than having another lunatic week. i'm glad that i could finally find some time to inhale properly. i never knew i always failed to hide the pain as how my dear sisters could sensed it out somehow. its satisfying that finally i could cry on someone's shoulder letting out all those pain i felt. but one thing that i learnt,i know i should dry the tears by now,never let the warm tears flooding my cheeks anymore. why the hell should i leave in this endless misery for a person who never even appreciate me,who wasted the two years together,who never had a piece of memory of me,who never even care to wish me happy birthday on my birthday? i know i sounded pathetic,but yes i was waiting for his wish the whole day,and how that ruined my twentieth birthday. but on the bright side,i know i will always remember my twentieth birthday somehow.i knew that i should throw the memories miles away,not to even had a piece of mind for a man that leave me struggling on a bad weather day cause i know i always had rain of love spared for me. dear God,i know you're holding my heart. if he is not worth thinking please take away this pain away i'm begging ya Allah.

dear sisters sarah amirah and nazihah syazwani thanks for keeping me strong.